Hey guys, in today’s blog, I’m going to share with you how to approach women. Even though this blog is for guys with approach anxiety, I hope it helps anyone to get over fear of approaching strangers.
What will be covered:
How to Approach Women: I’ll cover: What is approach anxiety? Why we have approach anxiety. The root cause of approach anxiety. Cognitive behavioral therapy techniques for approach anxiety. Let’s dive right in.
What Is Approach Anxiety?
Approach anxiety (also known as social anxiety) is the fear of approaching and interacting with people. It’s normal to feel some amount of anxiety before talking to new people, but if your anxiety gets in the way of connecting with others, it’s time to do something about it. Research shows that 1 in 5 adults struggle with social anxiety. And for men, social anxiety can lead to relationship problems, like low self-esteem, feeling depressed, and not being able to sustain relationships. That’s why it’s important to address social anxiety.
Why We Have Approach Anxiety?
Most of us have experienced some form of approach anxiety at one point or another. Even though we may not admit it, we know that we feel uncomfortable when we try to initiate a conversation with someone new.
Why do we have this fear? Evolutionary psychologists say that our fear of rejection stems from a desire to protect our resources (time and energy). When we see a potential mate, we want to make sure they’re safe for us to invest our time and energy in. So we have a natural aversion to people who may hurt us or the potential partner. That said, our fear of rejection can also prevent us from reaching our full potential.
For example, one study found that 38% of women reported feeling “too shy” to ask for a promotion. 30% of men said the same thing. So if you’re holding yourself back from advancing in your career, that’s something to look at.
The root cause of approach anxiety:
Usually a fear of negative evaluation. Even though we all want to be liked, there’s a big difference between wanting to be liked and fearing rejection. And when we’re afraid of negative evaluation, we actually create the results we fear.
Wanting to be liked can be a positive thing. It’s not so great when it turns into the need to be liked. When we feel the need to be liked, we can quickly find ourselves in a lose-lose situation.
If we agree to everything, we can be viewed as spineless and weak. If we disagree, we can be viewed as difficult and unlikable.
Think About It…
How Do You Know If Your Approach Anxiety Is “Real” Or Not? Here are three signs that your approach anxiety may be getting in the way of your dating life: You avoid social events because you’re afraid of talking to new people. You feel anxious before approaching someone new. You feel anxious even when you think you’ll get a good outcome (like a yes), feel anxious when you think about asking someone out, feel anxious when you’re actually going to ask someone out.
Here are the steps for becoming less anxious when you approach people:
#1: Name Your Fear What are you afraid of when you approach people? Maybe you’re afraid of rejection. Or you’re worried about looking stupid in front of new people. Whatever it is, name it. Then, step
#2: Determine How You’re Going to React Now that you’ve identified your fear, it’s time to figure out how you’re going to react when you encounter that fear. Are you going to freeze up and avoid the situation? If so, what’s the worst thing that could happen? Will you get rejected? If so, where does that leave you? Are you going to beat yourself up for failing? Again, where does that leave you? Basically, you want to create a worst case scenario. And then, plan on how you’ll react when that scenario actually happens.
#3: Do It! Finally, do it! Approach that person and face your fear head on.
Here are some tips that can help you get over your fear of approaching people:
Use short, simple sentences. Long, complicated sentences make it harder for the other person to process what you’re saying. So use short sentences. Simple sentences. Look the person in the eye. This shows that you’re engaged with them. Start slowly. Take your time to let the other person speak. Don’t jump right in. Speak clearly and slowly. Get your body language on point Eye contact, open body language, and voice tone are really important components of effective communication, but they are only part of the picture. It’s also important to pay attention to how you’re physically positioned. Are you leaning forward? Tucked into yourself? Arms crossed? Open up your body language so the other person feels like they’re talking to a friend. Practice makes perfect.
Approach people regularly. It may take a few attempts before you get comfortable with someone. But with practice, you’ll get better at reading body language and interpreting nonverbal cues. Use your strengths. What are you good at? What do you love doing? How about a specific skill?
These are some very important things to think about. You better know very well what you are bring to the table.
Slow Down Man:
I’ll list the kind of questions I get asked (usually from men who never approached a woman):
How to get the attention of women in bars?
Good approach to turn conversations with women into dates?
How to make the first move?
Best way to talk to a girl at a bar?
How to know if a girl is interested?
How to start a conversation with a stranger?
What is the best link to ask a girl on a date?
How to text a girl after the first date?
How to get a second date after a first date?
Advice to maintain a girl’s interest after the first date?
How to get a second date after a no-show first date?
How to ask a girl out at a coffee shop?
Tips to make a girl feel special?
How to make a girl fall in love with you?
What are ways to turn a hookup into a relationship?
And on and on…….
For start lets work on how to approach woman and overcome approach anxiety.
Then will focus on the next level.
Start here my friend and work on your confidence approaching women. After you have overcame your fear and anxiety, we will explore more ideas how how to get a date and ultimately a girlfriend.
Talk to you soon!!